TechieM2 I have looked at the free options. I use Word and Excel daily and OneDrive is the deciding factor. It would cost almost the same to use it as a stand alone. I will take a look at it again though. Data backup is the biggest issue for me. Thanks for the response.

adriana01 I do have $300 in savings for emergencies. It's not a lot but would hopefully get me through a rough spot. If I do need the $300 that I'd like to put to debt for something else then I'd be fine with that. I don't mind if it's an emergency. The less I have available the better I do with money. I don't feel deprivation when the "rule" is that there is no money for it, but if I have even just $5 then I want to spend more. I had not realized that about myself until now but it is so helpful to know how it works for me. If I give myself $5 for pet treats/donations then I want to spend it and more but if I know I have none I'm completely fine with that. Not sure why that is but I know I feel incredible relief having very little available to pilfer from or use to spend. I know that if I really "need" to spend $5 on my buddy, Woody, for a doggy treat I am more apt to just spend that $5 if my base is $0. LOL Sort of makes no sense but I can feel that it makes sense for me. I will decide what I will spend on a wedding gift and start setting that aside. It won't be a lot so I'm not too concerned about the impact on debt payment. I have to be brutal, militant, and unwavering with my finances. I know it sounds like I'm being mean to myself but it honestly is freeing and a relief to handle it this way right now. I obviously will access the situation along the way and make any adjustments necessary. That's the funny thing. I can be quite contained with the line items in the budget but know that overall rolling with the punches makes the most sense.

Thank you for the response though because it makes me think about how I feel about this. I do need to be intellectual about it but I also have to know that I will feel good about it. If I don't feel good, I will fail. Being strict will make me feel good. LOL 

adriana01 thanks. I am trying to be logical but also pay attention to the emotional too. I would be anxious if I had no savings so $300 is the compromise for now. I would also feel anxious if I give myself all kinds of spending money vs just saying $0, nada, zilch. I know that if I feel bad I will spend more money. Having $300 in savings makes me feel good. Allowing $0 for spending money makes me feel good.

I am trying to figure out if I am the same way with food. I don't think it's the food itself. I can have stuff her for weeks (ice cream, candy) and it doesn't bother me. It's the spending on the food that gives me the high. There are certain foods that I will overeat or impulse eat so I don't get those. I know that if I limit myself to $30/week ($40/week max) that I won't get all that impulse stuff. I will get the necessities and I'll be fine. I certainly won't starve. I don't mind eating the same things day in and day out. When I get bored I switch to something else. Making different things every day would stress me out. LOL If is funny to be an abstainer and allow myself nothing in some areas (money) but not in others (most food). Good info to know though. I am learning!

jenmas I know it sounds counter intuitive but the less money I budget the better I am at not spending and the happier I am. I know it doesn't make sense to everyone but if I budget $40 a month for spending I will feel compelled to spend that $40 and want to spend more. Whereas if I say I have $0 to spend I will know that's the rule and I will comply. It has been likened to being an alcoholic who cannot drink. Just one ruins the whole thing. It's kind of the same for me. Just spending $1 makes me want to spend $100.

I do not have diabetes. I have Small Fiber Neuropathy that causes nerve issues, not circulation issues. It would have been a luxury to have someone else do it but I can do it myself. I always think I deserve the best things in life whether I can afford them or not or whether it is appropriate or not. I can access this going forward and if I need the care I have someone to go to that is affordable. I won't do anything to make my medical situation worse.

The Verizon bill is high because I am paying monthly for the iPhone & iPad, $28. I also pay $10 each for line fees for the iPad (contract until August) and $10 for my Apple Watch. I will stop the iPad line fee in August and the $28 for the device payment will terminate. $40 plan fee, $20 iPhone line fee, $10 Apple Watch line fee, $7 iPhone insurance (which I may cancel in August too), plus the taxes and fees will bring me to about $80/month in August. In August I can look at other plans too.

I will cut back to $20 max/month on hair cut/color. I will take advantage of my friend's kindness and generosity and have her cut and color my hair. Again, I think I deserve the best, which means salon care, but I don't really need that. I deserve to be debt free.

Thanks for the responses. They are very helpful and get me thinking.

Purple Admiral I posted this before but it's important so I'll copy it here too. I know it sounds counter intuitive but the less money I budget the better I am at not spending and the happier I am. I know it doesn't make sense to everyone but if I budget $40 a month for spending I will feel compelled to spend that $40 and want to spend more. Whereas if I say I have $0 to spend I will know that's the rule and I will comply. It has been likened to being an alcoholic who cannot drink. Just one ruins the whole thing. It's kind of the same for me. Just spending $1 makes me want to spend $100. I do have $300 in savings for an emergency. It's not a lot but it's something. I want to pay off this debt more than anything. I have an amazing life and get to do a lot of things that cost little or nothing. I'm going to a play for free on the 24th. Last July I had a week at Disney at Disney Resorts, parks, meals, airfare, hotels, and it all cost me $100. Yes, $100. Spending time with my friends and my dog buddy, Woody, means more to me and makes me happier than spending money on a movie and popcorn. I can watch a movie with a friend and cuddle with Woody and eat popcorn for free. I have learned how to be happy with very little money. My happiness was always rooted in money and stuff which was wrong. Now I know where true happiness comes from - family, friends, dogs, and an occasional meal out. I have so much more than I need. And where I live has a gym, lunch available every day (if needed), Friday morning coffees, book club, movie club, garden club, art club, holiday parties, birthday parties, and so much more that I can't even remember. I do not really lack for anything. My spending is only to fill the voids that it really cannot fill anyway and I am learning new ways to fill those voids.

Thank you for telling me that about the wedding. That makes me feel a little better. I know that my sister and nephew will understand. I'd actually rather have them come out here sometime since they both love Colorado. If I could afford to be there I would but setting myself back half a year does not make sense to me at this point.

Thanks for your helpful responses. Lots to think about.

Purple Admiral thanks for supporting my plan and my decisions. It's nice to get the feedback. I am getting to know how I"m wired and it's been such a help. Fighting against the grain does me no good. I am not going to stress about the wedding now. Thinking about seeing them at other times when we can be together makes me happier. A nice gift will do! Thanks!

Purple Admiral I don't know if they do but I will ask. Great idea! They already have a flat in NYC (Brooklyn) so I'm sure they are set up with the household stuff. They both travel a lot (she is a fashion designer who goes to Paris a lot, and he is an engineer on big ships that travel the world on secret missions, seriously, lol) so aren't home all the time and they both make really good money. I planned on asking them if they will have an Amazon wish list or some such somewhere or something specific they want that I can contribute toward. I don't like nick-nacks or purely decorate stuff so I would not even think of buying things like that. I would definitely want it to be something they need or want. I also have thought about the experience thing. Since they are in NYC there are tons of option. Thanks for the suggestions.

xgirlmama the $121 for Verizon is for my iPhone, iPad (contract), Apple Watch, device monthly payment until August, iPhone insurance. It will go down to about $80 in August.

I have Netflix, Hulu, and Xfinity for TV/movies. My family pays for all of that. I pay for my internet and my Apple devices. I've cut the internet and Verizon as much as I can at this point. I have contracts for both.

I will cut the wedding. That just seems to make sense.

I know it sounds bare bones and it is money wise, but I am so happy and have so much fun and get to do so many things that cost little to nothing that I think I can afford to gut the expenses like I am planning. Also, because I do better when I have none vs having some it is easier for me to say $0 spending money than to have $40 for spending money. I get more anxious when I have the $40. I feel relieved when I have $0. I go to plays, out for lunch, watch movies with friends, spend time with my dog buddy Woody, do as many activities in my community as I want (movies, art, book, garden clubs, gym on site, etc.), so I have way more fun stuff available to me than I can take advantage of. I am an all or nothing, black or white person. I am happier spending nothing on myself and figuring out things to do that cost little to nothing, than allowing myself $100 that I will feel compelled to spend and know that it will cause me to spiral into spending even more. I'm like an alcoholic, but with money. Just one dollar (drink) will do me in. I know it doesn't make sense to everyone but I know that I honestly feel relieved knowing I won't have money to spend willy-nilly. I do treat myself with a movie at the dollar theater or a coffee with a friend or a sandwich at Arby's. I'm good with very little. The more I allow myself the worse it gets.

Thanks for the responses. It is helpful and it does make me think.

xgirlmama LOL yeah, it's phone/iPad/Apple Watch. I'm in a contract until August. Then I can look at other options. Part of it is device payment too (Yikes!). I have lowered it as much as I can until I'm out of the contract. I do "splurge" on $10 a month line fee for my Apple Watch. I left my phone at a friend's house once and couldn't get it for 2 days. That was not fun. It's worth the $10 to have cellular on the Watch.

Bruce as opposite as it might sound, cutting the spending money to $0 actually makes me feel more free and relieved. The less money I have to squander the easier life is for me. Not sure why it works that way for me but I know it does. Give me a $1 and I'll need $100. If I have $0, I'm content and will find all kinds of things to do that cost little to nothing. I have so much available to me that costs nothing that I cant' do it all.

I am in contracts right now with phone and internet. I have but both as much as I can. In August at can look at both again. When I'm ready to look I will ask for suggestions. It is frustrating to pay so much but I at least reduce them both as much as I reasonably can.

My internet is just internet/wifi. I am online ALL. THE. TIME. Since I'm not out spending money the internet is one of the ways I have fun - movies, TV, books, social media, etc. My family pays for Netflix, Hulu, and Xfinity movies for me. I pay for internet and my phone. We don't have much available for internet in my area but again, in August I will check again and see if there is a better deal.

Thanks for the suggestions. It's helpful.

Olive Branch I screwed myself with Verizon. I used to have prepaid too. Then I convinced myself that I deserved a new iPhone, a new iPad, and a new Apple Watch. Sigh. I am in a contract until August. I will research then what I can do to lower my costs for my iPhone & Apple Watch. I will cancel the line for the iPad which I don't need but can't get rid of until August. I rarely use much of the 5GB of data I have since I use wifi most of the time. I will definitely shop around in July so when August comes I'll be ready! Thanks for the response!

xgirlmama yes, I agree, donations on pause! Thanks!